Life is a Transition

I look back over the past two years and I'm amazed by how dramatically my life has changed since I left my position at the Web Hosting firm that I originally came to Atlanta to manage. Now, 21 months after starting Patrick D. Gaul, Inc., I find myself headed for another adventure and I must admit that I'm more than just a tad excited about the opportunities that having my own company have provided for me. Do I miss the stability of working for a firm with all the benefits? Yes, sometimes, especially when I write that check every month to Blue Cross/Blue Shielf to cover my company's health care plan. And I definitely often wish someone else was buying the ink cartridges and paper for my printers, not to mention the other stationary and office supplies that one needs everyday to run a business. You don't think about those things when they are provided out of a stationary cabinet, but when you buy them yourself day in and day out they suddenly become a fairly large item on the annual expense budget.

Anyway, I was thinking this morning about transition and how we experience transitions our entire lives. We transition from children to adolescents, from adolescents to teenagers, to young adults, to adults and then on to middle age and beyond. Live is a constant series of transitions and intermixed with these chronological transitions are all sorts of life experiences including college, the miltary, marriage, divorce, marriage, divorce, marriage (I may a tad unique in this area), children, grandchildren, etc. Life is just a melting pot of experiences and transitions and through it all we are suppose to maintain some sort of balance and perspective. I don't about you, but the whole process seems a bit buggered to me. I'm still grappling with the concept of maturity! Someone recently asked me "when did you become an adult?" How do you know if you've actually made that transition? Is it based on marriage, children, financial security? Heck, I'm headed hard towards 60 and I still find the concept of maturity difficult because so much of me is still drive by a youthful attitude and spirit! I like life and I love to have fun and to be a free spirit. I think if I did not have so many responsibilities with my family and my life I would be living somewhere quite remote, very distant from the urban sprawl that I now inhabit. Buckhead is so not the real world! I don't know how we ended up there, but I think it had something to do with the schools, especially Sarah Smith, which is quite close to where we live........great public elementary school! And Sutton, the middle-school isn't really that bad; unless of course you are one of the middle-schoolers attending classes each day, in which case it is probably horrible. I remember middle-school and they aren't happy memories. So many things happen between the ages of 11 and 13 and most of them are not fun..........it's an awkward time in a young person's life.

Okay, so I'm rambling a bit. I guess I don't really have a major point to make here. I'm trying to stay away from the politics for the moment and don't even ask me what I think about this bailout. $700B! Amazing and the more our government leaders warn about doom and gloom the more the markets respond. Doesn't anyone remember how to pitch a positive spin on things these days? Why couldn't there be reassurances instead of all of these guys (who should have been watching the shop all along) spinning the darkest scenarios possible? Like I said, I need to stay away from it for the moment. My blood pressure might just spiral out of control if I deep dive the details of this latest plan.

Dallas Cowboys lost yesterday. Now that's a disappointment! Not only will I have my brother giving me grief (you know, the one who roots for the Redskins), but I'll have Daniel on the line in gleeful spirits, which is more than I can stand on a Monday afternoon.

Is Anyone Else Bothered By The Noise?

Have you noticed that the more the Obama/Biden - McCain/Palin teams say, the less we know about what they hope to achieve if they're elected? Obama/Biden have clearly decided that the high road isn't going to get them to the White House and so it seems that they too are settling comfortably into a "war of slurs and innuendo" rather than a substantive debate around the issues facing our country and the global community.

Let me ask you this.........if you were a political leader in another country watching and listening to the noise around this election, would you be impressed? Would you think America is once again ready to take the helm and assume leadership around such critical issues as Global Warming, Terrorism, Finance, Nuclear Disarmament, etc.?

And no, I'm not going to pick on Governor Palin. The Lord knows that there are far better equipped political pundits capable of slinging mud her way. I will say that I think she is seriously unprepared for the road ahead and if I were John McCain, she would be doing quite a bit of studying over the next few weeks and very few interviews. I said that she would be the "difference that makes a difference" to a colleague right after the announcement and by that I meant that she would cost John McCain the election. After listening to her speech at the convention I offered that perhaps I spoke too soon, but after listening to the interview she did with Charlie Gibson I'm fairly certain my initial observation was correct. Can you really gear-up for a Presidential election in less than two months and be credible? Even if she is as smart as some folks have made her out to be (and I think there is a difference between being smart and being politically savvy), she was no more prepared to accept McCain's offer than John was to make it in the first place. He should have had Charlie Gibson vet her and he wouldn't be in this predicament. Oh well, if only he had hired me to advise him.

Sorry folks, but are we really going to go through all of this crap again; i.e.: the mudslinging, attack ads, negative publicity, dirt digging kind of politics that have defined the past two Presidential elections? How do we actually take some measure of control in this election? Aren't we "the people" that these men and women are supposed to be representing? How do you take a guy who was raised by a single Mom and had to use food stamps to feed her kids and turn him into some elite "uppity" character? How do you take community service and turn it into a negative. Dr. King has be rolling over in his coffin right now.

What can we do to start a grass roots movement to take back the political process around the Presidential election? I have a thought..........let's call it "Americans Decide.Org". Let's make it more about the process and less about the pundits. Force a debate around the issues and force platform presentations that clearly define what one would do should on be elected to the post. Heck, you wouldn't hire a top-notch consultant and not ask for a proposal of some sort. Would you? Why should we treat the Executive Office any different? Anyone can run as long as they have a serious plan to take the country forward. Let us decide who we think is serious and who is the fool. Makes sense to me, but then of course I'm just another one of those lost conservatives struggling to find some meaning in all of it. I still well in Obama's camp, but my goodness he needs to get back on track.

Meanwhile, a photo from Uncle Joe's over Labor Day. Joe just got his first "Air Soft" in honor of Governor Palin!

Back to School

Tomorrow morning Joe and Ellie start back to school. Where has the summer gone? It seems like just yesterday they were boarding a plane for the UK, but that seemed to fly by, especially since I had the opportunity to join them for a few days (let's call it a working holiday). I was on my way to Tel Aviv via London for a business meeting and managed to divert myself to the West Midlands for five days. I arrived on a Saturday morning from Atlanta via Paris to Birmingham and then had a delightful evening with my Kate's brother Julian, his wife Sarah and their three children; Grace, Abby and George. (Pictures are being posted) A bit too much wine and some very early scotch made Sunday a bit of a blur, but I managed to hang on and we visited some friends and drank a couple more glasses of wine before I called it a day. Monday through Wednesday were filled with short visits here and there to say hello to old friends while I occupied Michael's office (that's Kate's Dad) and spent multiple hours each day preparing for the latter part of the week. Still, all in all it was fun and London was a whirlwind for two days before flying off to Israel on the Saturday. Another five days there and I arrived back in Atlanta the morning after Kate and the kids returned, which explains why they were standing at the top of the escalator at 6:15 a.m. waiting patiently for Dad to arrive. Seems they had all been up since about 4:00 a.m. anyway, so why not meet Dad at the Airport. We headed off for the Landmark Diner and breakfast and then home, a quick shower and I headed off for the office where I spent most of the day. I am getting rather good at getting off planes after long trips and working. It's not my favorite activity, but sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do!

We were then joined my son Patrick and his two kids (Ashley and Patrick the 3rd, affectionately known as PJ) and they spent two weeks with us before heading back to Northern Virgina. He took our Joe and Ellie with him and then Kate drove to pick them up, spend some time with Jim and Becky (my brother and his wife) and then off to Ohio for a visit to Grandma and my sister Mary and her family. Kate definitely got some windscreen time on that trip!

They all arrived safely on Monday afternoon and this past week was another 50+ hour ordeal although I can't say it wasn't productive. As summer winds down we are beginning to see activity start to increase and hopefully that will spell a good September/October from a sales perspective.

Anyway, that is the really quick update. School starts tomorrow and life will get back to some semblance of normality, or at least that is our hope. Meanwhile the world is crashing down around our shoulders and with this latest hot spot in Eastern Europe I'm very concerned about things. But I'll hold those concerns for the moment and just share some photo's from our 2008 Summer.

"Leadership is a Journey"

I borrowed the title for this post from Ralph de la Vega, the President & CEO of AT&T Mobility, who was the guest speaker this morning for WIT's "Leader in Focus" Speaker Series held at Maggiano's in Buckhead. An impressive group of business leaders convened to hear Mr. de la Vega speak about his incredible journey from being a happy child growing up in pre-Castro Cuba to a displaced 10 year old boy in Miami living with family friends while his parents struggled to find a way out of Cuba after the Castro revolution. For over four years he was in the care of another family that he had never met before arriving in Miami, mostly out of contact with his parents, siblings and relatives and finding it very hard to adapt to being a kid in America in the early 60's. He told an amusing story about his first meal being a peanut butter sandwich with a glass of cold milk, the first glass of cold milk he had ever experienced. He noted that while he had learned to love cold milk, the peanut butter and jelly experience was not one of his fonder memories. I can relate since my British wife constantly shakes her head every time I make myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I suppose it's an acquired taste, but you got to love the cold milk!

Mr. de la Vega then talked about his journey through the American educational system and how he nearly found himself agreeing to strive for less than he knew he could accomplish by accepting a high school guidance counselor's advice to focus on becoming a mechanic instead of an engineer, which was his true desire. But thanks to his Grandmother, a former teacher in Cuba who arrives in the nick of time, he is set on the right path and realizes his dream of becoming that engineer and ultimately he becomes the engineer running one of the largest multinational enterprises in the country.

It was an incredible story to hear, but what really impressed me about his chat this morning was his focus on the kids in Georgia and the issues we face with an increasing and alarming rate of high school drop outs. Across the state the high school graduation rate is not much above 60% and when you deep dive the numbers in the inner city that rate falls somewhere between 40% to 45%. Couple these statistics with the reduction in STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) studies and an almost ingrained expectation of failure among the inner city kids and you have a recipe for a national disaster as we try to compete in the 21st century. How many engineers will China graduate this year? India? How about the USA? It is a staggering differential and one that needs to be raised to the highest levels of our government and addressed now. Outsourcing is a reality that is not going away and the key for this country is to possess the intellectual capital to move to the next stage of our evolution, which is to become the country of innovation and imagination. You cannot achieve that goal without Mathematicians, Engineers, Technologists and Scientists. It's impossible, and the real danger lies in the fact that many of kids today are not being given the incentives to even look at these fields.

I remember reading a book years ago entitled "More Like Us", written by James Fallows, a former speechwriter for Jimmy Carter. Published in 1989, it was a thesis on how to compete with the then emerging threats from Asia. Although considered somewhat weak by many critics, the one thing I took away from this work was his analysis on how other cultures arriving on our shores seemed to be able to maximize the opportunities that accompany the "American Dream", especially the Haitians who he pointed out had an impressive rate of college graduations among the second generation and an equally impressive rate of new business starts among the first generation. So why is it that a refugee arriving on a boat from Haiti can find the resources to build a life in this country, start a business, send their children to college, and become productive members of our society while the kids being born in our inner cities cannot find the the same opportunities? Fallows argues that it is a matter of an "ingrained expectation of failure" among the inner city kids that does not exist with the kid stepping off the boat from Haiti, or the plane from Cuba, in the case of Mr. Ralph de la Vega. They find opportunity in adversity and they never allow anyone to dictate what they can or can't become, which was a strong theme running through Mr. de la Vega's comments this morning. His "Four Pillars of Success": Have a Winning Game Plan; Take Risks; Overcome Obstacles and Recognize Opportunities resonated with the audience as did the principles he suggested were fundamental to leadership (Integrity & Credibility; Attitude & Teamwork; Excellence and Vision. Mr. de la Vega is an extraordinary example of what can be achieved when someone "Dreams Big & Believes in Him/Herself".

In closing, Mr. de la Vega talked about AT&T Aspire, a $100M program aimed at getting kids excited about education. He also mentioned the Junior Achievement Job Shadowing Program and how we can all help to connect our classrooms with the real world. I came away inspired by a man who has clearly taken the obstacles in his life and turned them into opportunities, but hasn't forgotten his roots or the struggles he went through to be where he is today.

Back!

Okay, I know that May 5th. was a long time ago and that I never even got around to writing anything about Game 7, which was so long ago that no one remembers that the Hawks actually took the Boston Celtics to 7 games before losing the first round of the Eastern Conference Championship Series. But things have been complicated and life has been a bit strange lately. Besides, I'm dieting and I never have anything worth saying when I'm dieting because I'm too busy being hungry. Got to lose some weight though because my trousers are getting really tight and I hate looking like the guy who just had the big pasta dinner when he should have stuck with the salad. Know what I mean?

The difficult stuff? Well, for starters, Mom moved into a facility up in Ohio that caters to people her age. It was an emotional roller-coaster for everyone, but especially my sister Judy who has watched over Mom the past nine years and who would have probably done just about anything to avoid having to participate in such a decision. But Mom is nearly 90 years old and the level of care required has increased year on year and it finally reached a point where she could no longer bear that burden alone and there just wasn't enough support from the rest of the family (including yours truly) to make it feasible. Everyone had legitimate reasons why they could not take Mom into their homes for any lengthy period of time......mine was that with two children approaching their teens we simply did not have the bandwidth to accommodate a person with Mom's needs into our lives, as harsh as that sounds to most folks. The federal government certainly doesn't help that much although with Medicaid she is entitled to a space at the Ohio facility and according to Mom it is a pretty decent environment; i.e.: not your traditional nursing home. It is actually a rehabilitation center and they have a small group of seniors that live there. Mom gets physical therapy everyday and is finding that she can walk better, although I think it takes it toll on some days and she finds herself a bit weary. Hell, you go to physical therapy when you're 90 years old and you might find it a bit taxing as well! Anyway, thanks to our sister Mary, who lives in Ohio and who found this facility, things seem to be working out for the best. She and Judy sorted the details and coordinated the move, and with some financial assistance from my brother Jim, the move happened in early June. We'll have to wait to see it it continues to be as successful as the first week plus appears to be......I know everyone is holding their breath in hopes that Mom really does adjust and finds it to an acceptable place to live. God, I hate the idea of growing old!

On other fronts, the business role continues to be quite challenging with the current economic environment. I remain committed to advancing the business, but I don't know how long it will take to affect a real turnaround and that is always problematic when you are working for someone else. I see some signs of improvement, but not enough to stand on my desk and shout for joy, if you know what I mean.

Joe continues to improve, which is great news. The latest drug that his doctor prescribed seems to be having a very positive effect on his behavior and his general attitude towards life, and we are hopeful that this is a path to some level of stability down the road. He (and Kate) certainly deserve a break from some of the frenetic emotional roller coaster rides that have been indicative of the past year. Too many ups and downs wears on a person and with Kate bearing the brunt of the daily engagements it has been especially difficult on her. The cost continues to spiral upwards and we are now spending between $1,200 and $1,500 per month on the doctors and the drugs with almost zero support from our medical insurance. Of course the COBRA finally ended and I purchased a plan from Blue Cross/Blue Shield that costs us over $1,500 per month and still no help with Joe's condition. It is as if no one wants to recognize that kids suffer from ADD, Tourette's or OCD. Lose a limb and BCBS is right there with a check, but get a neurological condition and they just don't want to know. Is health care on my presidential agenda for November? You're damn right it is and whoever I vote for had better put forward a plan that makes sense.

Can you believe what's happening in this country at the moment? I purchased petrol yesterday and the cheapest I could find it on my route home was $4.07 a gallon at a Kroger's on Roswell Road. Most of the stations were in the $4.09 to $4.29 per gallon for regular and over $4.50 for the super premium levels. It's insane. The cost of petrol is up 95% since January of 2007.......95%! How crazy is that? And don't tell me it's about supply and demand. There are some traders out there making a serious buck for their clients on the backs of most Americans and the guy we got running the head shed doesn't have clue. It's scary folks that we put such an idiot in the White House. All of us who voted for him deserve to have our hands smacked severely for being so stupid. What were we thinking?

I'm completely at a loss as to which direction to go now that Hillary is out of the race, and I suspect she is completely out of the race. I can't imagine for a moment that Barack and his team want her baggage along with Bill, who proved to be a complete and utter disappointment during her campaign. What would they do with Bill if they offered her the VP slot? Besides, I don't think she really wants any part of Barack or his administration anyway. Bide her time and wait to see if the guy folds during his first term, which is very possible; i.e.: another Jimmy Carter. On the other hand, if he lays out a plan that makes sense even if it means higher taxes for awhile, I'm going to find myself taking a serious look. The more I watch John McCain the more I find myself thinking about Richard Nixon. I know I've said that before, but take a look folks. He really is starting to look and act like Nixon in the 1972 election. Too smug and far too condescending for my tastes. I thought I'd find myself voting for him a few weeks ago, but a few weeks can make a huge difference in this election and right now if Barack lays out a plan for achieving his objectives and that plan has substance I'm voting for the guy. Scary, right? My niece will be painting herself blue and running up and down the streets of San Francisco shouting "My Uncle Pat voted for Barack"!. Okay, maybe she won't go the blue paint route, but if I vote for Barack she will definitely start to believe in miracles. Hell, even I would have to believe in miracles if I vote for the guy, but who says a leopard can't change his spots? I've seen enough of neo-conservatives to last me a lifetime and while John McCain is far from a neo-con, his sound bytes seem really in tune with the current administration. Anyway, like I said......a few weeks in this election and things change.

Nothing much left to report although in reality a ton of stuff has happened over the past 6 weeks. I'll try to get back in tune with my writing over the coming days and make a serious effort to have something positive to say about life, the universe and the pursuit of happiness.

I'll close by posting a photo of Joe and his Godfather and our good friend, "Uncle Charlie" Gottenkieny at a basketball game (where else folks?)

Game 7

Well folks, Friday night was an incredible evening and the Hawks pulled in the largest crowd in the history of the franchise in Atlanta. It was a tight game with the Hawks pulling it out at the very end with some outstanding play from Joe Johnson and Al Horford. The arena went wild and the whole town was talking on Saturday. Unfortunately, yesterday afternoon did not turn out quite the way we had hoped as the Celtics absolutely thrashed the Hawks in Boston and put the dream to bed for this season. Oh well, but what a storybook series and even though we lost badly yesterday, it still took the mighty Celtics 7 games to put us away. I'll therefore not take any grief from any Boston Celtics fan. Imagine. The best team in the NBA having to play 7 games to put away the Hawks! With Cleveland, Detroit and the Lakers waiting in the wings, I would not be so sure of the future and I sure as hell would be counting my lucky stars to have won the final game so convincingly. At least that puts some lustre back into their reputation.

Should have some pictures soon from the night and next season should be a blast assuming we get some help on one or two key positions.

Game 6: The Hawks vrs Boston

That's right and who would have ever imagined that our Atlanta Hawks would have actually taken the Boston Celtics to 6 Games? Well, if I'm honest, certainly not me, and I suppose I owe the team an apology for not having more faith. Even worse, I missed games 3 and 4 at home and will now have to settle with attending game 6 this evening. After the beating we took in Boston on Wednesday night, which gave the Celtics a 3/2 lead, I'm not certain that we can recover and force the series to a 7th game, but I'll be there to support the team and hopefully we can find the right combination of players and plays to make things work out in our favor. I do think we are going to need a break-out performance from Marvin Williams and some outstanding bench play if things are going to work out for Atlanta. Moreover, I do think there is a strong possibility we can pull off the upset, but it's going to be difficult and even if we don't walk out with a victory the team can hold their heads high having beat the season's best team two out of six........let's just hope it doesn't work out that way and we end back up in Boston for a Game 7. That would be magical! By the way, the guy in the blue sweater and tan trousers with the white hair is none other than yours truly.....and if you look carefully to the left, you see a kid in a red shirt dancing in the asile.....yep, that's Joe!

Masada

In the latter part of March I traveled to Israel to attend a global conference for the firm that I work with today and after a night in Tel Aviv, a morning in Jaffa and a absolutely scary ride to the Dead Sea with my boss, we set up camp at a hotel positioned right on the Dead Sea. Although it is an extremely rugged environment, it is quite lovely in many ways and my eyes were constantly being distracted by the wild beauty of it all.

On the second afternoon we ventured to Masada, a site of "ancient palaces and fortifications in the South District of Israel on top of an isolated rock plateau, or large mesa, on the eastern edge of the Judean desert overlooking the Dead Sea. Masada became famous after the First Jewish-Roman War when a siege of the fortress by troops of the Roman Empire led to a mass suicide of the site's Jewish Sicarii fugitives when defeat became imminent." (Credit to Wikipedia).

So there we were, standing at the base of this big rock and everyone getting ready to walk up the snake path, which is the more complicated of the two routes to the top, and despite my advancing years I reckoned I give it a try once again. I had, after all, scaled the beast in early 2000 while working with another firm in Israel. How hard could it be to do it 8 years later? Well, the answer my friends is that it proved extraordinarily difficult and after huffing and puffing for nearly 45 minutes I finally allowed reason to take command and I retreated back down the path to the safety of the base camp. I was of course a bit embarrassed as I was the only one of those that attempted to reach the top to retreat. But I knew at a certain point that while I could have probably made it to the peak, I was seriously risking a heart attack if I did so. My rate rate was a steady 150 to 160 and I was as red as a beet. Like I said, common sense prevailed and I elected to opt for the healthier option.

So, how did I come to this point? After all, less than 8 months ago I was about as healthy a 57 year old as you could find on this God's green earth. I was hitting the gym at least 2 hours every day and getting in plenty of cardio and weight training. I was down to a relatively trim 197 lbs and I was even slipping back into 36" waist trousers, although they were admittedly a tight fit. Still, a far cry from the 38"/39" trousers that had been haunting me earlier in the year.

Now, I'm back to being tight in my 38" waist suits and I can't tie my shoes without losing my breath. Hmmmmm! Could it have something to do with the fact that I'm working 10 and 11 hours a day, 5 days a week and often a half day on Sunday? Could it be that I have this work/life balance completely haywire again? Could it be that I've sacrificed all the hard work that I did in late 2006 and through the first half of 2007 for the sake of a paycheck?

I had a long conversation the other day with a young lady that I used to work with in years past and we were comparing notes. You know. Careers, spouses, children, where we are today compared to where we wanted to be all those years ago. And I discovered that I really don't have a very strong grasp on what's important to me these days. Two great kids who get ignored by Dad in the evening because he is too tired to engage them. A wonderful wife who feels alone and distant from her husband through no fault of her own........and a Mom, who only lives 45 minutes away, but does not get to see her grandchildren nearly enough.

Okay, so I've come to this discovery (like it's the first time I've been here)and once again I've got to make some critical decisions about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I'm not certain what path I will follow, but I know that the path I'm on at the moment is not the right one and that things have to change. Perhaps it is as simple as getting the work/life perspective more balanced, or perhaps a more radical change is in order. I've always been passionate about any engagement I undertake and so I sort of understand why I've made such a commitment to my present situation. I want to succeed and I want to be recognized for being successful But at what risk........"What does it profit a man to inherit all the riches of the world if he loses sight of his soul?" (apologies for the literary license with the Lord's words, but you know what I mean)

Stay tuned folks as I traverse this journey that confronts me. I don't know where it will ultimately take me, but I know that I must take it if I'm to find the peace that seems to constantly eludes me.

Out of the Closet

I guess it is time to come out of the closet and admit that I have now officially contributed to Hillary's campaign on two occasions, the most recent being earlier today. My daddy must be dancing on the clouds to think that his boy has seen the light and moved away from the dark side; i.e.: the Republican Party. Of course, there is a slightly dark lining to this otherwise wonderful tale of conversion. You see, I'm attracted to Hillary because she is the most conservative candidate running for the office of the President of the United States (in my most humble opinion). I know she still has a mighty mountain to climb if she is going to wrest the nomination away from Barack, but I'm hoping that by some miracle she does pull it off and gets to run against John McCain come next November. I think she will do well on the experience side and I think that she is more politically savvy than Barack, who will (I think) get his ass handed to him by John McCain.

My conversion has been slow and the transition from a Republican to an Independent to a publicly acknowledged Democratic leaning voter has not been easy. I'm still conservative at heart and I still resonate with many of the values espoused by the Republican Party, but unfortunately the Republican Party that I knew and loved under Goldwater and Regan has twisted itself into some neo-religious base of extreme right-wing enthusiasts and I simply can't find a place for myself within the Party. I suspect I'm not alone.

Anyway, there it is.......everyone now knows the truth. I'm no longer the right wing conservative in the Gaul family. In fact, I don't know if there are any true right wing conservatives left in the family (at least two brothers-in-law don't count,,,,,apologies to Roger and John).

Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.

C

SoCon '08 Photo's