Saturday, October 11, 2008

Challenging Times


It started well. A new job with lots of exciting opportunities and my first trip to the Colorado Rockies to spend some time with the executive management team. All seemed sort of right with the world as I sat in the conference room at the Happy Valley Ranch just outside of Boulder. I really enjoyed the profession approach to team building that was being taken and I was learning much about myself and the men and women that I will be working with over the coming months and hopefully years. We were nestled well up the mountains at nearly 9,000 feet elevation and while the air was thin, it was clean and crisp and Thursday morning was absolutely delightful with that briskness that one can only experience in the mountains. Then, on Thursday evening as I sat in a restaurant with the rest of the management team enjoying a glass of wine and a lovely meal, my mobile phone rang. It was Kate and she was really upset.....crying and it was all I could do to understand her with the noise in the restaurant. Something about Joe and the hospital. I rushed outside so I could hear her and after managing to get her to calm down I learned that Joe had been admitted to a Behavioral Health Clinic that evening as part of a strategy that his psychologist, psychiatrist and doctors all agreed would be best to address the most recent challenges we have collectively encountered with Tourette's. I'm calm now, but at that point in time all I wanted was to be home with Kate and Ellie and to get to the hospital to see Joe. After finishing my conversation with Kate I walked back into the restaurant and shared what was going on with the CEO. He asked me if I wanted to go home that evening and I said that I did and he was on the phone to his Executive Assistant and with an hour a flight had been arranged from Denver to Atlanta on the red-eye, which would put me back into Atlanta at 5:30 a.m. on Friday morning. I finished my meal and some colleagues drove me to the Denver airport and I arrived back at the house around 7:00 a.m. on Friday morning.

Seeing Joe for the first time in that environment was incredibly difficult and I immediately understood why his Mom was so upset the night before. It is called a Behavioral Health Clinic and it's designed to work with a wide range of behavioral health issues, both with kids and adults. The rules are hard and patients are treated with a certain level of objectivity as opposed to compassion. The nurses are a bit hard-core and conversations are candid and very direct; e.g.: your son cannot do this, or that, or go there, or have this in their possession. Joe was beside himself last evening when we visited and he desperately wanted Mom and Dad to take him out of that horrible place. How do you tell your son that having him secure in a place like that is the best way to get him to a happier place in his life? How do you tell him that everything is going to be okay when every instinct tells you to pick him up and carry him out as quickly as possible?

The facts were relatively straight forward. Joe needed to switch from one course of meds to another and during the transition he would experience significant anxiety and distress and having him go through this process in the care of professionals was the best option for him and for our family. The Doctors told us that it would take between 3 and 7 days to complete the process and if everything went to plan Joe would emerge a happier child and the most recent episode of Tourette's would subside significantly. All good stuff, but all horribly frightening for a 12 year old lad.

We were with him again on the Saturday for an hour and while he wasn't as distressed as the previous evening, he was still clearly unhappy at the thought of staying another night. He kept telling me to make certain the Doctor released him on Sunday evening, which I knew wasn't going happen since the Doctor wasn't scheduled to see him again until Monday morning. And even then it could take several more days before he would be ready to come home.

Scary stuff, especially when you know there isn't a bloody thing you can do to change the course that the process needed to follow. But hopefully this new approach will work as advertised and our Joe will grow into a healthier state, both emotionally and physically. This most recent escalation of the Tourette's has worn him out and he needs some time to relax and be a 12 year old kid instead of hanging out in a Behavioral Clinic. We won't know for for awhile, but I know Joe has lots of prayers coming his way from friends and family and I know God is listening and watching over him. Still, it would be nice if he could catch a break. It seems so much has been placed on his shoulders so early and I can't imagine what it must be like at school where he is ridiculed and taunted by his peers.

I could write for a week about the school situation.........the teacher who told Joe to "stop it" because she had not taken the time to read his IEP and the stupidity that most of his peers display when they take an extra moment to tease him and make him feel like he is somehow inadequate because he has Tourette's. I can't quite figure it out, but it's obvious that this is a cruel world and Joe is going to have to get tougher if he is to survive. We can't depend on the school because the teachers are either incapable of grasping the full extent of Joe's challenges or they simply don't care.

Time will tell if things are going to change for the better. Meanwhile, we are motoring forward in hopes of a better tomorrow. With God's help we will get there soon.

Friday, October 03, 2008

Last Day









For those of you who follow my adventures, this is my last day with the firm that I joined just over 15 months ago. It has been a really interesting experience and I've met so many wonderful folks. Part of me doesn't want to accept that I won't be in touch with them everyday, but as I said in my previous post, transitions are unavoidable most of the time and I'm really looking forward to my my next great challenge.

That challenge is going to be working with a firm in Boulder, Co. and I'm on a plane next Tuesday morning to get things started. What a great little town Boulder is......beautiful mountains everywhere and just the nicest people. In fact, they are so nice, you would think they are from the south!

I went to the HiTech Prayer Breakfast this morning. In case you don't know this event, it is the largest networking event in Atlanta. There were nearly 1,500 folks there this morning and the line-up included Rollin Ford, the CIO of Walmart, an impressive guy who told a wonderful story about Trust, Relationships and Accountability, which he described as the "pillars" of his life, both personally and professionally. I suppose the most impressive aspect of this event is the sheer number of technology professionals who are there to openly acknowledge their relationships with Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour. I'm not talking neo-con's here. I'm talking about men and women from every aspect of technology, from software to telecommunications, from interactive marketing to voice recognition, from "C" level to hourly associates, all gathered to acknowledge the impact that God has on each and everyone of us.

I sat next to this delightful chap who is a senior executive with a local software firm and throughout the program I watched him scribble notes on 3x5 cards as he listened intently to the speakers. Indeed, as I scribbled right next to him I also observed many folks at the various tables doing the same thing. The event began at 5:59 a.m. and lots of these folks had gotten up at 4:30 a.m. to attend, but you could not find a sleepy eye in the house. Everyone was so engaged and attentive.....now, if only I could get that much attention at the Georgia Technology Summit next spring!

Polly Harper has been trying to get me to the HiTech Prayer Breakfast for the past five years, but for one reason or the other I have not been able to attend. I am so pleased that I made it this morning and I know in my heart that next year I'm going to find a way to be involved with this program. Thanks Polly!

I think the most powerful personal experience I took away was the importance of placing your trust in God. Our family has been struggling the past two week with Joe, our 12 year old son. Joe was diagnosed with Tourette's Syndrome a couple of years ago and very recently we began to see a significant increase in the visible symptoms of the disorder. He has developed a facial tick that causes his face to screw-up and his head to jerk from side to side. It is the most visible manifestation of the disorder to date and of course it is creating all sorts of problems at school. 7th graders are without mercy when it comes to kids who are "different" and Joe feels that pain everyday as they talk behind his back, point at him and laugh and otherwise behave as 7th graders. Of course this doesn't make it anymore comfortable for Joe, but you know, I believe God has a plan for Joe and while this may not turn out to be his favorite part of that plan, I know that God's plan for Joe is going to wonderful at the end of the day. As I bowed my head this morning and prayed, I asked God to continue to watch over my son and to give him the strength to work through the next few years because Tourette's only advances in severity during puberty. I know that Joe is going to need a lot of strength and encouragement from his family and friends, but he is also going to need a personal relationship with Jesus Christ to help him hold his head high while others gawk. I sincerely hope that I can help him find that relationship over the coming weeks and months and I know that I won't be alone in that effort because if needed, I met nearly 1,500 folks this morning who would come rushing to my aid if asked. That is the power of Jesus Christ. I remember Paul's letter to the Philippians wherein he explains that his imprisonment has served to advance the word of the Lord and that folks should not feel sorry for him. Hopefully Joe will someday look at this time in his life as the time he found the inner strength and put his faith in the Lord ahead of the personal anxiety he is currently experiencing.